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Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot January 29, 2015
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Ya' think we're taking football a little too seriously these days?... Re: Deflate-gate. Not since the Plumbers broke into Larry O'Brien's office has a more superfluous edge been sought... Next, they'll make Brady go meet with Sharpton... The ball boy? That's like blaming some kid down in steerage for not spotting the iceberg... I know one thing. The Patriot's ball boy is about to start sharing a cell with the filmmaker who caused Benghazi... Gitmo will end up being emptied out except for the ball boy for the Patriots... Harry Reid says due to his training accident, he cannot read what's in front of him. Yeah? Pretend it's a healthcare act... I get the feeling the only exercise Michael Moore ever gets is walking back stupid statements... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot January 22, 2015
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
I believe the Trivago Guy is one of the advance reptilian scout team from "V"... Snoop Dogg is the Foster Brooks of cannabis... I think moderate Islam should be organizing a "Million Muslim March" to protest these atrocities - guys?... Does Obama bug you? Gird your loins, because Elizabeth Warren makes Barack Obama look like Wendell Willkie... I do find Obama Churchillian - unfortunately it's Ward and not Winston... "Are we not men?... We are Davos! Are we not men?... We are Davos!"... Kerry now says he meant to go over with Jim Taylor, undoubtedly the toughest 215 LB. SOB in the entire history of the league. #thebaddestofbadasses... I reiterate, Roger Goodell's got the NFL so messed up I'm surprised he isn't Time Magazine's Man Of The Year... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot January 15, 2015
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Barbara Boxer is the single stupidest public figure I've ever seen... Barbara Boxer could lose a game of Hangman to a box of hair... Barbara Boxer's seat in Congress will become empty in 2016, but not nearly as empty as it is when she sits in it... Somewhere down the line, I hope Barbara Boxer leaves her lack of a brain to science... It's turning into 1920's Chicago with people who don't believe in drinking... I had a pretty good shrug weekend. Obviously, not as good as Obama shrugging Paris... Obama's now officially creepy about Islamic Terrorism... Well, at least we didn't send Jar-Jar Biden... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot January 8, 2015
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Anyone have a forwarding address for Ebola? It's been months since we've heard anything... I put getting bold, visionary leadership out of the Republicans on the same never-gonna-get-it wish list as De Niro making good movies again... I hope to honor the memory of those killed in the horrific events in Paris. The President will take at least one day off from emptying Gitmo. Just one... The Western World is past suicidal in not reacting to the Paris attack. We're standing on the ledge with an inner ear infection... Mike Pereira IS the NFL!... The NFL's problem is that it's the world's most touchy, delicate, violent, brutal sport. Hockey Rules!... There is an I in teiam... Almost that time of the year when we watch the Stars pretend that the People's Choice Award is the one that "really matters"... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot December 18, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Under the First Lady's new obesity guidelines, you are not allowed to bet someone a dollar to a donut anymore... Also under the guidelines, any cookies left out for Santa this year must be gluten-free... I see they've changed "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" a little. Herbie no longer wants to be a dentist because of stipulations in Obamacare... According to the CDC, flu season in the United States is off to its earliest start in a decade. Great. If this trend continues, soon it'll be starting in October like the Christmas decorations... The National Organization for Women issued a statement that President Obama's cabinet should be half female. Biden misunderstood the statement and went out and got breast implants... I don't begrudge Obama his vacations. It's all the time in between his vacations that I find he does a crappy job... Tony Robbins seminars are less fawning than the press corps is for Barack Obama... Man, there are some angry drivers out there. You know what my new greeting is to people? "Hi - get some help"... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot December 11, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
I still respect the office, but I don't respect the man anymore. Really Barack? Al Sharpton?... Obama will approve the Keystone Pipeline as long he's allowed to move illegals through it... Just saw Obama's new pick for Secretary of Defense. Is that Buddy Hackett's son Sandy?... Are we really willing to trust that, if Iran gets the bomb, they won't immediately use it on Israel? Depending on the good offices of bad people seems like a no-win to me... You can't compare the War on Terror to the Cold War. Nikita Khrushchev at his shoe-bangingest looks positively quaint next to these lunatics... Politics is religion for atheists... You just know that if you hired Biden to mow your lawn, within ten minutes he'd be knocking at your door clutching a bloody stump because he reached under to pull a clump of grass out without turning the mower off. Well, since we can't trust him to mow the lawn, let's make him the second most powerful man in the world... This administration won't be happy until the only people in Gitmo are the ones who interrogated the former Gitmo detainees... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot December 4, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Islam is popular in poor countries because it prohibits things people can't afford anyway... Good riddance to all those Democrats that got beat in the mid-terms. Don't let the door hit you in the Biden... Al Sharpton's comeuppance is having to go through life as himself... The White House Christmas Tree got delivered. Not through the front door - it came over the fence... The National Organization for Women issued a statement that President Obama's cabinet should be half female. Biden misunderstood the statement and went out and got breast implants... The downside of the government teat? When you take away the darkness of the abyss as a possibility if you don't hustle it, you cut the heart out of human existence... According to the CDC, flu season in the United States is off to its earliest start in a decade. Great. If this trend continues, soon it'll be starting in October like the Christmas decorations... I don't begrudge Obama his vacations. It's all the time in between his vacations that I find he does a crappy job... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot November 20, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Man, there are some angry drivers out there. You know what my new greeting is to people? "Hi, get some help"... Liberals don't even want to know the "little people" they're saving. Liberal compassion consists of strutting around the room bragging about which of your chattel you're saving... Behind closed doors, the vast majority of liberals are Gruber... What Gruber meant to say is that John Roberts is too stupid... The New York Times is no longer the paper of record, it's just a building in New York that foreign acrobats climb... How clever - Democrats are using their huge screw ups as a distraction from their numerous smaller screw ups... Thanks to Obama, right now ISIS's biggest problem is what to name the new country when they finish taking territory... Honest Obama speech: walk to the podium, say "I've signed amnesty," give the finger, and walk off... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot November 13, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
I had a Jewish friend who held a cannabris - they only smoked the tips of the marijuana leaves... You don't have to caricature Harry Reid to get at his essential badness... As Majority Leader, Harry Reid has consistently been the blockage in the renal canal of the legislative process... New ISIS kids' show: Sharia Lewis and Handchop... Board game idea: Consequential Pursuit, where the questions are all big, like "Who won the Second World War?"... The only time Obama offers you an olive branch is if he knows you go into anaphylactic shock from olives... Washington fought the Red Coats, Reagan fought the Red Menace, and Obama's fighting the Red States... Look at all the red on the map on election night. That red's paying for all that blue... And dot's dot, folks!
 
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot November 6, 2014
Dennis Dot-Dot-Dot
Julian Assange looks like Illya Kuryakin if he were the Dinty Moore guy... Ironically, the pants in Julian Assange's new clothing line are all button fly, which makes it hard to take a leak... North Korea's banned all tourism to stop Ebola. I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but why can't we be more like North Korea?... Tuesday was everything I hoped for and more... Sandy Fluke: blow it out your diaphragm - that I paid for... That Perdue guy went through Georgia like Sherman... Mary Landrieu is like a Hillary Clinton Mini-me... I flipped over to MSNBC after the election and they looked like they were on the dessert course at Jonestown... And dot's dot, folks!
 
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