Filner looks like Jack Napier after he climbed out of the vat and Way Bandy ran him thru Earl Scheib for a base coat of pancake make-up...With Peyton, Eli and Cooper being such good kids, Archie and Olivia must definitely view Bradley as the black sheep, err, ewe...Yeah, that's why I watch football, I want to hear how Ziggy Wilf is being gang audited. By the way, who's the Minneapolis architect, Jor-el?...I can't believe Roger Goodell oversees a sport he obviously finds so reckless and violent. What a greed head! Shorten the season, U Thant!...Did the Donner party have a sommelier?...Unfortunately, the moron who constantly screams "Get in the Hole!" at PGA events works during the week as a colonoscopist in my neighborhood...Would it be ironic or terrifying if the NSA was using the MetLife blimp "Snoopy 1" to surveil us?...If you're a creationist, Libs cite Darwin. If you say you adhere to survival of the fittest they tell you to be more Christ-like in giving...Just reading Tse-Tung's "Little Red Joke Book." ROFLMAO!...If you do watch the Al-Jazzera America equivalent of "60 Minutes" and you hear a "Tick-Tick-Tick" sound from the TV, dive out of the room... And dot's dot, folks!