March 21, 2013
Posted by Dennis Miller
Healthcare Dr.ones?...Hope the new Pope works as hard off the ball as Manu Ginobili...The government spent $1.5 million on a study of why lesbians are overweight. Listen, the reason lesbians are chubby is they feel no need whatsoever to attract men. It's that simple...The government spends $27 million teaching Moroccans how to make pottery, and we don't even have a pot to pee in over here...The government's spending $325,000 on robotic squirrels. Ironically, "Robotic Squirrel" is Biden's Secret Service code-name...Saudi Arabia's looking to stop doing beheadings because of a shortage of skilled swordsmen. A lot of them are getting out of the business. You ask them what they want to do, and they say "I want to direct"...I wish the judge's ruling on Bloomberg's soda ban had been simply "NO! This is CRAZY! What are you DOING?"...Obama might have Palin by 5 to 7 IQ points, but she's got him common-sense-wise by light years...Am I being catfished by 51% of the country when they talk about how adept Obama is? Is "Adroit Obama" the new Manti Te'o's girlfriend?...Obama is that whiny civil servant that you get in the next line when you see them at the beginning because you know they're going to be the headache...And dot's dot, folks!